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| Beware the Hellish eyes.. woooOOOOO |
And as it is appointed unto men once to die, but after this the judgment: Hebrews 9:27 (King James)
I dunno, more “Christianeze” I guess for I’m going to Hell. So there we have it.. it’s official. Thanks, Sign Dude. You just saved me a long and boring trip through the bible. Now that I know I’m already going to Hell I don’t need this book anymore. I am not perfect nor will I make any attempt to be. I’m just trying to do the best I can with what I've got. If I happen to do a little masturbating along the way then so be it. Shit happens.
I'm beginning to realize that if by some miracle I'm able to form some sort of connection with this book or this deity, it would not be in a way that anyone can appreciate. So, when certain “born again” Christians inform me that I am going to “roast in hell” for not falling completely in line with their beliefs. There's only one way I can really respond to that..
Thanks for the memo.. I’ll bring the barbecue sauce.
I serve the God of second chances. Repent. Which of the actions on this sign do you WANT to continue in? Keep seeking him.
ReplyDeleteWell, let's see. There will most likely be some more fornicating if I can help it. And drinking, nothing like a few cold ones to take the edge off (or get fubar). I'm a reveler, I like to party. I have no idea what a sodmite is and neither does spellchecker. And I don't even know why masturbating is up there but that's a given. I haven't tried witchcraft yet but as far as I'm concerned it's just another cult so I might as well explore that one too right along with the bible. I'm already going to Hell for abortion. Anyone that claims to not be a hypocrite is being hypocritical. I'll admit, I participate in the occasional blasphemy as well. So, I guess for the most part.. most of them.
ReplyDeleteWell, let's see. There will most likely be some more fornicating if I
ReplyDeletecan help it. And drinking, nothing like a few cold ones to take the
edge off (or get smashed). I'm a reveler, I like to party. I have no idea
what a sodmite is and neither does spellchecker. And I don't even know
why masturbating is up there but that's a given. I haven't tried
witchcraft yet but as far as I'm concerned it's just another cult so I
might as well explore that one too right along with the bible. I'm
already going to Hell for abortion. Anyone that claims to not be a
hypocrite is being hypocritical. I'll admit, I participate in the
occasional blasphemy as well. So, I guess for the most part.. most of
them.
perhaps the sign should include a category such as "people silly enough to believe my sign"?
ReplyDeleteThat might be a waste of sign space. No one would go to Hell for that. Honestly, I'm more surprised it left out gays. They're usually at the top of the list.
ReplyDeleteIf that's a waste of sign space, then the Bible to which the sign is referring is completely different from the Bible I read. I sure hope he's the one who was duped not me! My Bible says "If any one of you is without sin, let him be the first to throw a stone..." The sin to which that particular quote is referring would be fornication, but I think anything else on the list would fit. And, best I can figure, throwing a stone = condemning.
ReplyDeleteThat's pretty good. You have some fine logic there. Nothing points the finger quite like an enormous sign with HELL and YOU in giant letters. I would have thought you would applaud this sort of behaviour. It certainly falls under the "sanity" category. I was wrong.
ReplyDeleteYou caught me. I actually do admire his zeal. Doesn't mean I agree with him, though.
ReplyDelete